Town Talk | The brain is positively amazing

Sixty thousand divided by 24 hours divided by 60 minutes = 41.6 thoughts a minute. But hang on, some of us sleep, let’s say, on average seven hours (although my husband does considerably better).

Sixty thousand divided by 17 hours divided by 60 minutes = 58.8 thoughts per minute – almost one for every second we are awake.

Surely, that can’t be correct. So, I’ve been doing some research, and the consensus seems to be 60,000 to 70,000 thoughts per day.

Here are a couple of pieces of information I came across:

• About seven distinct “conceptual entities per second” is the mind’s speed limit.

• Every day, our minds are flooded with a constant stream of thoughts, ranging from mundane daily tasks to deeper contemplations about life and the world around us. According to research, the average person has about 60,000 thoughts per day.

Well! My mind boggled at that — but there was worse to come. I was disturbed by this from the US National Science Foundation: Of those thousands of thoughts, 80 per cent were negative, and 95 per cent were the same repetitive thoughts as the day before.

The very idea that people could go, day after day, thinking the same thoughts they had yesterday is thought-provoking. What is going on?

Even worse, 80 per cent of their thoughts are negative.

This is a recipe for unhappiness — for depression, even. If thoughts are predominately negative, people are in a bad mood, aren’t they? Coming to work, driving our trains, making our coffees, delivering our groceries, raising their children?

This research tells me that the brain is a three-pound universe that processes 70,000 thoughts each day using 100 billion neurons that connect at more than 500 trillion points through synapses that travel at nearly 500km/h.

The signals that travel through these interconnected neurons form the basis of memories, thoughts and feelings. How we think is how we feel. Certainly, our thoughts, if spoken or not, can affect others — and our view of the world.

What it doesn’t say is that the brain can be controlled, and we can stop these miserable thoughts and make ourselves happier as a result.

My grandmother’s story

My grandmother’s name was Anne. One day, she reluctantly went to visit a friend who lived nearby. She was not keen to visit because her friend, Mavis, was always miserable — and this day was no exception.

Over a cup of tea, Anne was told all the things that were wrong with Mavis’ husband, all the problems she had with her home, everything about her ungrateful sons — and it went on and on.

Finally, Anne escaped and was accompanied to the gate by Mavis, who was still complaining. Anne admired the flowers in the garden, and Mavis said, “And the zinnias will be dead in the morning”.

I was a small child when she told me this story — I think seven years old. Anne said she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry when she left Mavis — and decided on laughter.

The story went around the family and rapidly became a family saying. If anyone were complaining, someone would say, “And how are the zinnias?”

We still say it — my cousins and I — because it reminds us to stay positive.

A workplace story

Many years ago, there was a problem in the News office with one of the departments. They were quite obviously unhappy and well under their budgeted target. When I was asked to ‘fix it’, I watched them closely for a couple of days. They had been trained to smile when they answered the phone, but there were few smiles — and certainly no laughter, in a place where laughter was encouraged.

When I spoke to them individually, there were a couple of problems I could fix — and I did. However, there were also personal problems that I couldn’t do anything about. So, we had a group chat and a group hug and decided on an approach that might help.

If someone had a problem at home — for example, an argument with a partner — they would think about it while driving to work, but when they exited the car, they would consciously slam the door on the issue. And walk into the office with a smile.

They also did the reverse. When they arrived home in the evening, they would slam the door on work — and greet their partner with a smile. I had no idea at all if this small exercise would help, but I thought it was worth a try.

This was a good team with enormous potential, and they all did as requested — didn’t bring personal problems into the office and didn’t take work problems home. It turned out to be an effective strategy, and if they had a work issue, they discussed it with me before going home. They were much happier in the workplace and made up the substantial deficit within six months.

They celebrated one another’s birthdays by taking turns to bake a birthday cake. One day, a lady came into my office — laughing. She said, “I forgot to bake a cake for Tessie’s birthday, and it’s your fault. I shut the car door at work and completely forgot about the cake.” I happily went into town to buy one.

Then, I had a call from a large advertising client. He thought I might like to know that the department was wonderful. “They are all so cheerful I want to give them money!” he said.

The improvement in their attitude to work wasn’t solely due to this little exercise — but it certainly helped. And the little game spread to another department.

We can control our thoughts

When I imagine people thinking the same negative thoughts, day after day, my heart aches. It is relatively easy to fix. I became aware of my negative thinking in the early 1980s — and because these thoughts made me miserable, I decided to stop them. I was spending a lot of time thinking about all the things that could go wrong in our lives. I was also thinking negative, critical things about other people. And I was regretful about not having enough education. Why? Of what use is regret? What gave me the right to judge others? It took a while and needed constant maintenance — but it was definitely doable.

That is why I returned to study — I found myself thinking, “I used to have a good brain”. That is why I sometimes write like a Pollyanna!

If we have positive thoughts, we experience beauty in the present moment, focus on the task at hand, kindle creativity, feel gratitude, create genuine connections with others and create constant awareness of the people and things we love. Forgiveness comes easily, and joy is in every day.

Our readers

I have known many of you for quite a while now. I know some of you very well indeed. Of all the conversations I have had — over coffee or on the phone — the vast majority of you seem content with your lives. A couple of our retired readers have told me that they are enjoying life more than ever. I can remember only two chats where people were feeling down and out.

So, it is likely that all I’ve written today is useless to you. However, if you know someone whose ‘zinnias are about to die’, you just might be able to help. If they are close to you, please try!

This world needs all the positivity it can get, and the resulting contentment is a worthwhile goal.

Christmas

For those of you who read Town Talk in the newspaper, it will be Boxing Day before I chat with you again. For those who read on the website, it will be earlier. I wish you all the happiness that Christmas promises. I just heard from one of our readers who has 21 for Christmas dinner. I told her she is crazier than I am — I have only 17.

I am missing my mother; I always do at this time of year because she loved Christmas so much. Her named bauble hangs at the top of the tree, as usual. It was put there by the tallest grandson, who was just three years old when Nanny left us. He was emotionally affected for some time; not happy in this house, he kept standing in front of her favourite sitting spot — as if he could make her come back.

There was another three-year-old grandson, who was quiet and didn’t appear to be affected. However, two years later, when his mum miscarried, and the change in expectations was explained to the children, this little fellow’s first question was, “Will the baby be safe with Nanny?” You never know with kids, do you?

Anyway, my mum met all her great-grandchildren, which is fortunate.

That’s it for now.

I really must explain this week’s photo. I went through my files and couldn’t find anything genuinely relevant or exciting.

So I chose a pic of two of our adult grandchildren, Jake and his ‘little’ sister India. It was taken on Jake’s wedding day, and the photographer wanted a photo of the siblings. In six of the seven pics, they were doubled over with laughter. This was the most sensible! Neither of them knew why they were laughing so uncontrollably; he started it, and it just couldn’t be stopped.

I wish you laughter, and may it be easy, my friends.

Marnie

Email: towntalk@sheppnews.com.au

Letter: Town Talk. Shepparton News. P.O. Box 204. Shepparton, 3631.

Phone: Send a text to 0418 962 507. (Note: text only. I will call you back if you wish.)