'‘I don’t know what they’re on about,” she said. ‘'Women are much better off than they used to be. Town Talk should have a look at it.''I made no promises. What do I know? My life experience is similar to that of other women my age – and there were times when I didn’t even recognise sexual discrimination or insult; let alone fight back.
When I was 17 I was offered a promotion, in the local branch of a large company. The rules, for taking a management position included getting a health check. The doctor, filling out the form provided, asked what it was for – so I told him. He laughed. ‘'What does it matter? You’ll be in the kitchen in a couple of years.”
When I remember it now, I can think of several appropriate responses (one of them quite rude!). But then, I was silent. If I took the position, I would be replacing a 40-year-old male – however, I still accepted that, as a very young female, I probably wasn’t worth much.Then I was self-employed and I didn’t encounter discrimination again until the mid-80s. In this instance, I responded very differently – I was no longer 17 - and I lost my temper.
To be totally fair, my boss at the time, immediately recognised the injustice of paying a woman less than a man and adjustments were made. It was the unfairness that caused me to thump my fist on his desk! (Absolutely true and I’ll never forget it.)So, from my perspective, the situation of women has been gradually improving for decades. The pendulum is swinging; just not fast enough for many.About one and a half million years ago, most of humanity lived in matriarchal societies. Women were greatly respected for their ability to give new life. They ruled the tribes, led female armies into war and were healers. They all worshipped a female deity. How content everyone was, anthropologists can’t tell us.
Although there are still a few small matriarchal communities in Costa Rica, Indonesia and India, most men eventually got tired of it, of course, and rebelled. I imagine that, after being second-class citizens for a few millennia, they were rather harsh leaders.So, there we were, for thousands of years, totally dependent, unable to make decisions for ourselves or our children and freedom was ‘just another word'. God had replaced the Goddess of the past. And it wasn’t until the 19th century that multiple women started putting up their hands – to heal, to learn, to teach.
It was the 20th century before they became leaders of their nations. Margaret Thatcher ‘made it’ because she was tougher than the men around her and it is hard to imagine Angela Merkel being discriminated against. Who would dare?Here, as new laws are being debated, politicians need to be very careful that ‘sexual assault’ is clearly defined and that it is fair to both sexes.
Are we really saying that friendships between men and women cannot include any physical contact at all? Or are we banning friendships in the workplace?
The women I know well consider themselves equal in every way and are certainly capable of setting boundaries for themselves; and the men I know well would never consider assaulting or insulting a woman. Is the tail wagging the dog - or have I been particularly fortunate?Men are not the enemy. They are our partners, our friends and our workmates.
So, what is a satisfactory outcome? Personally, I don’t want either a matriarchal or patriarchal society. Neither is healthy; neither is productive and neither is fair.
I think that with equal opportunity, equal pay and equal respect comes the strength and confidence to stand up for ourselves in the home, in the workplace and in the world.However, we must remain alert because the pendulum is swinging and we need it to pause right bang in the middle, for a fair and balanced society. I’d love to hear your opinion on this matter; particularly if you disagree.Thank you for your interest in the post office re-creation and, if you have yet to visit the John Pick exhibition, now is the time.Have a good day and may it be easy, my friends.
- Marnie
Email: towntalk@sheppnews.com.au
Letter: Town Talk. Shepparton News. P.O. Box 204. Shepparton 3631.
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