Every hair on my body stood up when I heard those words fall from his lips.
Both shocked and concerned, I asked him why he thought that would be the result.
I wanted to know if he meant he was going to personally struggle when his access to TikTok was withdrawn, or whether he’d seen some content where other under-16s were spiralling over the impending changes.
He matter-of-factly told me that he couldn’t care less about losing it.
“And anyway, I’ll get it back in less than a year.”
Given the impact of his words that triggered the conversation, there was still doubt in the back of my mind as to whether it was nonchalant bravado talking, or whether he was more troubled by it than he wanted to let on.
The irony is that the ban itself intends to better the mental health of young people.
It makes me wonder if the execution was right.
It’s always hard to have things taken away from you when you’re used to having them: privileges, luxuries, finances, love and affection, freedom.
Social media now nests in that list for those who’ve had their access revoked.
Many adults wouldn’t cope either if they were banned from their favourite social channels.
But one look at any comments section on a public Facebook post will illustrate that many adults probably should be banned from it.
I truly get why the decision was made for youngsters with underdeveloped and impressionable minds.
It can be a toxic environment online with even full-grown adults losing all decorum and forgetting how to behave civilly with other human beings who hold different opinions to their own.
But somehow, I feel that the ban has potential to damage the kids who’ve already been using it for years.
It’s not about throwing your hands up in the air and saying, ‘Oh well, it’s too late now, they’ve already been exposed.’
But, if the government changed the car licensing age to 21, would it then go and revoke the P plates from all the 18- to 21-year-olds who had successfully passed their tests and been at the wheel for up to three years already?
No. They’d just say, anyone turning X amount of years after X date would now have to wait until the year X to be eligible.
Imagine the uproar otherwise.
I know it’s not the same thing.
And I know the ripcord had to be pulled.
But something just doesn’t feel quite right.
I’ve seen many people online liken the ban to another COVID for our kids.
I remember well how I felt locked down in my house, a single parent with three boys much younger than they are now.
Freedom gone, in-person socialisation with people my own age gone.
My son has some neurodivergence.
He goes to a school with few other students.
Friendships are hard to make; friends are few.
But he had some friends on social media.
And though not real life, it was something.
It was an outlet to socialise regardless of how artificial that environment might seem to a well-adjusted extrovert who has never suffered social anxiety.
For now, he is one of the ‘lucky’ ones whose access has not been denied, though his online friends did not escape the ban and have disappeared.
That in itself is another way to make the ‘different’ children feel even more different.
I guess, maybe illogically, I feel grateful that if he has to be ostracised any further, it’s by keeping his access, rather than being denied it.
For how long, is perhaps another heavy conversation for another day.
• For more information on the social media ban for under-16s, visit esafety.gov.au
If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, call Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800, Headspace on 1800 650 890, Beyond Blue on 1300 224 636 or Lifeline on 13 11 14.
