Don’t underestimate your ability to make someone’s year

It’s crazy — we’ve never been more connected thanks to technology and ease of travel, yet here we find ourselves lonelier than ever before.

One of the best decisions I’ve made in the past few months has been to host regular ‘drinks’ at my house in order to bring people together, and as a by-product, also to me.

There had been several shifts in home occupancy of houses in my street in addition to some of the senior neighbours unfortunately passing away, leaving their partners widowed and alone.

With everyone coming and going and cars hidden in garages, we could easily go for months without seeing one another or even knowing who’s moved in.

Surely the benefit of living in the country is community, trading citrus and borrowing cups of sugar, right?

The blessing of not being wall to wall with your neighbours like you are in the city can also mean you’re far enough away to not actually catch each other in passing.

I spent a lot of last year choosing to hide away, needing to rest and to heal.

However, with that inevitably came loneliness.

When a family friend moved up the road from me in our small town, she asked if I would have a few people over for Christmas drinks so that they could all be introduced.

Little did she know that the idea had crossed my mind several times in the weeks prior.

Each time I’d thought of it, several other thoughts followed; they probably don’t want to socialise, they probably want to keep to themselves, they probably don’t like me.

So this request from my friend was the push that I needed, and as it turns out, a life-changing one.

Everyone I’d asked was genuinely excited and joyous in accepting the invitation.

In fact, I’m not exaggerating when I say that every single person said they were “looking forward to it”.

I kept it simple: “Just bring whatever you’re drinking and a small plate of something to share.”

It was such a lovely evening and I continued to get several messages and notes in the days that followed thanking me and expressing what a nice time they’d had.

In particular, the senior widow gentleman brought tears to my eyes when he told me that inviting him to those drinks “made his year” and had been “the best thing to have happened to him”, as he had been lonely and now had all these new friends around him.

Those new friends have gone on to connect him with additional new friendship circles.

Seeing his newfound happiness has given me so much joy, and I like to think his wife would be grateful that we’re looking after him, and also that we make sure he waters her beautiful roses!

The first ‘drinks’ was just before Christmas — I’ve since hosted several gatherings, and it’s like getting a big, fat, heart-warming hug seeing everyone mix together each time.

In addition to the benefits of creating community, it also forces me to ensure my house and entertaining area are presentable.

Most of us don’t drink much, if at all, and everyone prefers an early night, so there’s no hangovers or tiredness the next day. It’s brilliant!

So, please, do yourself, your neighbours, family and friends a favour, pick a date and invite people over (or to a local park!) for a catch-up.

You never know, you might just make someone’s year.